phapulous

Living life being phapulously me!!

The beauty of reflection December 31, 2012

Filed under: Inspire Me — p.h.a.p.ulous @ 10:31 pm
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As we close out 2012, I took a moment to reflect on my  2012.  I can say that this year has been very much a rollercoaster of emotions.  I have experienced great joy and tremendous pain.  Both personal loss and personal gain. Some relationships blossomed while others were strained.  Despite it my love for family and the goodness in people remains. My perserverance was battle tested and sometimes wounded to the point of surrender.  However everytime I was ready to waive the right flag the right person, place, or thing would appear and assure me that I would make it through.  I have had the opportunity to learn a lot about myself. What my emotions are during my high times as well as low times.   I have learned who my inner circle consists of and I am okay with that.  I understand that just because you are a friend to some does not mean they are a friend back- and that was okay.  I understood where they were and chose to either meet them on their level or I left them alone.  I have learned to show more empathy without letting that blind me from the true person.  Overall I am very thankful for the growth and the tests.  Without them I would not have a story or testimony to share with others.  Be safe out there tonight and bring in 2013 with love, peace, and joy in you hearts!!

 

The Return October 17, 2012

Filed under: Self Centered — p.h.a.p.ulous @ 10:34 am
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It has been a LONG time since I last posted.  Such is life.  These past few months have been very busy so I took a little hiatus from my writing.  During my time away life happened fast and furiously.  They were the best and worst of times, a myriad of emotions and maturity.  I had the opportunity to welcome new members into the family, care for recovering loved ones, and the emotional pain of saying goodbye to dearly departed loved ones.  Through it all, I was able to process each and every moment and take a lesson from it to apply to my everyday living.  I took that time to reflect, inspect, and learn so much about me and the relationships I have cultivated.  I am refreshed, renewed, and exhilarated.

Here we go!

 

Friendship May 20, 2012

Filed under: Food For Thought — p.h.a.p.ulous @ 7:40 pm
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I came across this poem that perfectly sums up my friendships and thought I would share.  Hope you enjoy! 🙂

 

A friend is like a flower, a rose to be exact, Or maybe like a brand new gate that never comes unlatched.

A friend is like an owl, both beautiful and wise.

Or perhaps a friend is like a ghost, whose spirit never dies.

 A friend is like a heart that goes strong until the end.

 Where would we be in this world if we didn’t have a friend. – By Adrianne S

 

Forgive and Forget?? May 16, 2012

We often hear the phrase “forgive and forget”.   This got me wondering how many of us truly do this?  How many truly forget a painful and awful act caused by a loved one?  A lot of times we are able to forgive someone of their actions because after all we are only human right.  I just wonder how many of us truly forget the painful act.  Can we forgive someone without forgetting? Or is that not really forgiving if we keep the memory of the hurt etched in our minds?  This got me to thinking of myself.  For a long time I thought I had forgiven this one individual for hurting me emotionally and not acknowledging their actions.  I confronted this person about how I was feeling, and they gave a haphazard apology.  I let them know that I felt the apology was not sincere, but I would accept it.  I thought that was it.  I should have been immediately cured of my emotional pain right?  Boy was I DEAD wrong!!  Even though I forgave the individual, every time I heard their name my skin would crawl.  My mind would immediately take me back to the pain this person caused me.

Then one day I had an epiphany and asked myself what good does it do me to hang on to a memory that causes me to become upset?  After all I am sure the person who offended me had moved on.  I claimed I had by forgiving, but why was I still kept in bondage by holding on to  the memory?  This was tough for me to grasp.  I mean let’s face it, I allowed another individual  power over me.  It is funny now that I think about it because I was walking around holding on to memories and I was far from a memory in their mind.  How did I let myself get so caught up in the offense that it allowed me to remain stagnant?  After all I HAD forgiven them right?  Wrong!!  To me a part of forgiving is also allowing yourself to let the memory of the offense fade into the distance.  It is working for me so far, however notice I said fade.  Which means the actions are still in the back of my mind reminding me of how far I can go with and what to expect from that individual.  It is truly a process, but each day is better than the day before.

I am curious to know your thoughts on whether it is realistic to forgive and forget???

 

Happiness May 7, 2012

Filed under: Food For Thought — p.h.a.p.ulous @ 9:58 pm
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Happiness

Like the birds sing a sweet song.

 Like the rivers strum a lovely tune.

 Like the stars serenade the moon.

Like flowers look so pretty in June.

Like water makes violets grow.

Like winter brings flaky snow.

 This true and no jest. Love is the blueprint for happiness.

by Lamar Cole

 

Where is the Love? April 17, 2012

Filed under: Food For Thought — p.h.a.p.ulous @ 6:57 pm
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I came across this on one of my friends Facebook page and wanted to share. I really enjoyed the M&M analogy

“I don’t understand hate and prejudice just like I don’t understand why some people are biased against and pretend to not like certain colors of M&Ms.  It’s all in your head because they all taste exactly the same; and regardless of the color of their shell, they all look just alike on the inside too.
 If you don’t believe either is true, wash the color off a pack before eating them or wear a blind fold while eating them and see if you know what color it is you are eating.  I’ll buy the M&Ms, set up the experiment and record the data for you. . .
  All people were created in God’s image. We all require a heart, a brain, lungs, blood,etc.  Inside we are pretty much all the same. If you don’t believe me ask a doctor.   Better yet, ask any surgeon if he/she is handed a heart to put into a transplant recipient if he/she can tell the color of the person it came from just by looking at it. . . 
Prejudice and bias start and cultivate in the mind.   If you don’t like a particular person because they did something to you, fine.   But how do you hate an entire subset of people who you don’t even know or have ever had any dealings with previously?  
 We have all had bad experiences with people of various backgrounds, but do we begin to hate all teachers, police officers, relatives, doctors, friends, classmates b/c of a bad experience with one?   So explain hating an even more generalized subset of people. . .
 People are like M&Ms. We were made to be a little soft and sweet on the inside and some of us can be nutty too, but we are born fundamentally all the same.   Remember, although our personalities may be Skittles, we as people are M&Ms.” ~Nyke
 

Moments of Pleasure April 13, 2012

Filed under: Inspire Me — p.h.a.p.ulous @ 5:36 pm
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Moments of Pleasure

baby coos

island sunsets

laughing children

long hugs

lazy days

walks in the park

making someones day with a kind thought and word

running in the rain

dancing to my own beat

pineapples

walking barefoot in the sand

a good love story

holding hands

looks of longing

falling asleep in the arms of the one you love

Smiles that tell me I’m loved

Letting people know they are appreciated by me

Just a few things that give me moments of pleasure

~P.H.A.P. 🙂